Rough

It has been a rough week over here.  This is a hard job.  So hard.  Some days I just don't think I am up for it. 
I wrote about the boys napping on Monday....
Tuesday no one napped.  They spent an hour and 45 minutes escaping, getting swatted, playing, screaming, escaping, laughing, crying, getting swatted.  I was back there every 2-5 minutes.  I was exhausted.  At an end.  Didn't know what to do.  Totally stressed out.  Miserable.
The rest of the afternoon was terrible too.  They were so tired.  And they whined.  And they crabbed, and fought, and screamed, and whined, and snatched, and whined, and cried.  They were in bed at 6.  They all fell asleep relatively quickly, but N was awake 45 minutes later screaming...which he did for 45 more minutes.  (I have noticed he does that if he is overtired...he goes to sleep then is up after a sleep cycle for awhile).  It was horrid.  I was stressed out and wasn't able to relax at all, not even through the night and into Wednesday morning.   
I asked some girls in my multiples group for advice, and got some good advice.  Tuesday night and Wednesday I mulled around ideas, and finally decided to work hard core for a solid week at training them to stay in bed.  I have always said that you have to work hard for a week before ANYTHING will take root in my experience (potty training, bottle weaning/cup training, pacifier removal, etc), but that if you work and are consistent, it will take a week.  I don't know if that will be the case here, but I decided to try it for a week.  I also got 2 crib tents from friends.  To those who don't know, yes, it is sort of a baby cage.  It is a netted dome that goes over a crib to prevent a child from escaping.  So I will work for a week, and see where we're at. 
I think I am anti-crib tent because I feel like my kids have beat me.  I know this isn't true, and I know that life is just different with 3 kids at once, but I think that is my hangup with them.  But, I have to adapt and accept what I have.  So we'll see. 
And I think my sanity is more important than whether my kids have "beat" me in this area.  I was a train wreck the last 48 hours.  I snapped at my kids. I doubted myself as a mom.  I was sure I was not good enough because I didn't read enough, care enough, do crafts enough, play enough with my kids.  I doubted myself as a wife...my house wasn't clean enough, I was dumping on my husband and not loving towards him, I didn't have dinner made.
Thankfully Wednesday they were exhausted and napped without escaping, and today they went to sleep pretty quickly as well, and no one tried anything wacky. 
So we'll see where we're at in a week.  I hope I am still sane.