Today I miss my babies

 Big boys are loud.  They fight.  They bite.  They rip books multiple times.  They are deaf and/or have selective hearing (maybe that loud part has something to do with this).  I have to repeat myself not just once for each kid (that is four times already) but about three times per kid (math whizzes, that is 12 times).  12 times saying "Please buckle yourself into your lunch chair.  Go to the bathroom.  Get your arms in the straps.  Don't hit your brother.  We don't rip books.  Not so loud.  He asked you to stop. We don't say poop.  Get off of me.  Don't hit me.  Get in your bed.  Find your blankets.  Hang up your coat.  Find your shoes.  You may not have his book.  SHARE."  Etc, etc, etc. 

I am tired. They are nuts.  Days like yesterday and today, I want my sweet babies back...the ones who YES did cry and YES did need me to hold them and YES had me sleep deprived, but NO did not yell or talk or talk back or whine or disobey or hit or bite or rip or ignore or be malicious, and did NOT require multiple timeouts in a house where there just is not room for 3 kids to have timeout at the same time.  While I did have to hold 2 babies (or more) at once, I didn't have to haul them off of each other, one kid held in each hand, and hurl them into timeout for biting/hitting/screaming. 

A taste of today: 

• I just pulled L off of N's belly where he sat while C yanked on N's hood and tried to drag him along.  Screaming was involved all around. 
• Z wanted to help N look at a book, N didn't want help and told Z, Z didn't listen, N took a huge bite out of him. Again, screaming all around. 
• N went to timeout in his bed since he was screaming like a lunatic, where he proceeded to rip at least 2 books to shreds, then hit me when I yelled at him. 
• I didn't feel like grocery shopping yesterday when I would have been by myself (MORON), so I had to take all 4 boys this morning for a big ($120 at Aldi) trip, on a Monday before a holiday.  They took up the cart while I had the groceries in a bag, under the cart, and a few in the cart that could handle being stomped on. 
• Z dropped the apples at least twice (those will be delish now), and N and L took turns saying POOOOOOP.   
• (One good thing was that someone felt sorry for me...I let her go in front of us and she left $5 for my groceries). 
• On the way out to the car they all FREAK about where they are going to stand on the cart (since I checked out and the cart is now full, not in my bag anymore)...resulting in L throwing himself on the ground in the MIDDLE of the road in the parking lot with cars waiting. 

I miss my babies.  And in just a few years I will miss this age too.